This is actually the title of a post written by my friend Noise on his blog My Failure At Modern Living – I loved it and therefore I stole it (actually I politely asked his permission but that doesn’t sound as good).
From the original article:
“While one hates to be prejudiced, one can tell an awful lot about someone from the things they buy into – what they value or don’t value, what causes and practices they feel are important or not important.
Because it’s strange and surprisingly varied the things people care about, or more to the point how much they care about them. You think you know someone and then one day, blam! They tell you they see Jeremy Kyle as a moral compass, or never really liked the Indiana Jones films…”
Noise’s list is hilarious in its oddness, and I highly recommend that you go read it here. In the meantime, and because I cannot help but jump on a bandwagon, I thought I’d write my own.
One final quote: “Neither is this a list of things I hate, necessarily, and neither is it exhaustive. I don’t, for example, say I could live without racism on this list, but please don’t take that to mean I love a bit of racism or, indeed, find it moreish.”
So, then. Onward!
1) Ballet pump shoes
2) Nutella – don’t mind it, could easily live without it
3) The Conservative Party. All of them. Every last one
5) Lord of the Rings
6) Harry Potter – controversial I know, but it/he just does nothing for me
7) People who think writing erotica automatically means that the author welcomes any and all saucy propositions
8) Liquid eyeliner that has a life of its own and CAREERS across your eyelid halfway along the line
9) Touche Eclat – s’okay, but then so is Superdrug’s own
10) People who proffer unwanted and unasked-for advice on the internet
11) People whose advice might actually be useful if only they didn’t preface it with the deadly words ‘You MUST’ – because that is the one thing that will guarantee that I WON’T
13) Being assumed a chav simply because one lives in social housing
14) ‘Moist’ toilet tissue – the one thing that toilet paper needs to not be is ‘moist’. Urrrrrrrgggghhhh
15) Toolkits ‘for women’ that are like normal toolkits only smaller, more useless, and painted pink
16) ‘Powered by Fairydust’ stickers on cars
17) The Monarchy (except possibly Harry, if he got a proper paying job)
18) Nick Grimshaw
19) Reality documentaries about people on benefits
20) Reality documentaries about people with too much money
21) Reality documentaries about any specific social group
22) Mars Bars
23) Being told ‘Smile, it might never happen’ – it already did, I got told to smile by a cunt
24) Soap operas
25) People who don’t like dogs
26) Stepping on a bath mat in your socks, only to discover that it’s wet
27) Zips that don’t catch properly, thus giving minor stress every time you do it up just in case you get trapped in your jacket
28) Microsoft Windows
29) Jamie Oliver
30) Those gel nib pens that are a tiny bit scratchy on paper
OOOH I FEEL CLEANSED!!! So, what would be on your list? Comment below!