Today’s post is brought to you courtesy of SEX DUCK. He’s been around for a while now, but as I was talking the other day about how brilliant novelty sex toys are these days I figured he was worth mentioning on here. As it’s difficult to explain in text I’ve done a little video introducing you to both SD and his nifty little friends. For god’s sake just don’t look too closely at the state of the room behind me… Hopefully you can’t tell that the dog started attacking my foot halfway through filming. And that he then proceeded to crap on the carpet behind me, the ensuing stench being the cause of me fumbling my words towards the end. FUNTIMES. All three of the toys in this video are made by Big Teaze Toys and yes, I was given them for free. I’m under no obligation to write about them though, and even less to be anything other than honest in my views. Nor am I being paid for this post. You can read my full disclosure here Violet x CLICK HERE TO FOLLOW SEX, DEATH, ROCK’N’ROLL ON FACEBOOK TWEET ME!...Read More
The response to my recent post about why it’s okay to want a decent sex life elicited just the most amazing response – I heard from endless people who had been (or still were) in the same miserable situation that I escaped from. Whilst reassuring to know that I’m not the only one to have sailed that lonely boat, it was also incredibly fucking depressing to realise that such situations were so common. I have therefore decided to make it my ongoing mission to explain to as many people as possible why it is perfectly acceptable – nay, a...Read More
There’s a silent (relationship) killer in town. And its name is ‘Not Getting Any’. I’ve thought long and hard for months about posting this blog publicly, because obviously it is/was a private matter. But this shit is IMPORTANT. I also thought it would go some way towards explaining why I’m so passionate about talking openly at every opportunity about sex in all its guises. Too many times I’ve regaled friends and acquaintances with my sad tale of Not Getting Any (I’m the kind of person who will happily discuss dildos with random strangers in the bus queue), only for them to say ‘that happened to me but I was too embarrassed to say anything’ or ‘my husband/wife really doesn’t fancy me and it’s upsetting, but I don’t know how to say anything’. Plenty of us go through droughts in our sex lives, usually down to being single and bemoaning the lack of decent potential partners. But what if NGA strikes when you’re in a relationship? Even more so, what if that relationship is (you thought) a really good, healthy, steady one – what then? For more than a decade I was with someone I loved very much, but whose interest in me waned dramatically somewhere around our youngest son’s second birthday. Given that childbirth and the tiny baby period was done and dusted, I’m pretty sure that neither of those had anything to...Read More
I’m going to tell you personal shit here, whether you like it or not. Are you ready? I have two labial piercings. So now we are Friends because you know things about my pant region. Suck it up, motherfuckers. Both were carried out under the correct hygienic conditions and for the simple reason that I wanted them done. My fouf, my choice (that should totally be on a tshirt). But my fanjita is now potentially illegal. I MIGHT HAVE AN ILLICIT FOUF, PEOPLE! LET US GATHER TOGETHER THE ILLEGAL GENITALS AND STAND PROUD! This confusion has been caused by the Department of Health’s recent decision to regard intimate piercings as a form of female genital mutilation (FGM). From the Telegraph: …now any woman whose clitoris or labia has been pierced – even if it was entirely her own decision – will be seen as an act of FGM. In return, the DoH had this to say: While there are challenges in this area and adult women may have genital piercings, in some communities girls are forced to have them. The World Health Organisation has quite rightly defined this as a form of FGM. “We are taking every precaution to record genital piercings that have been done within an abusive context. “The new data collection will help build a picture of the scale and the nature of the problem we are...Read More
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The print on this tshirt makes me look like I have a chronic case of dandruff ❄️ pic.twitter.com/iIJW…
It’s as close as I’m going to get 🖤 I CANNOT DO A THING WITH THESE NAILS ON 😱😂 pic.twitter.com/iS1M…